Going with the flow.........

Do you know what I really like about this life? The fact that if you don't stress about things and go with the flow it always works itself out - possibly not in the way you want it to, but always in the way it was meant to.

I'm terrible for going with the flow when there's a decision to be made - it's not that I don't care, or don't have an opinion. But that life has shown me that what is meant to be, will indeed be - without any care for your wants/opinions.

I took this approach when first diagnosed, much to the concern of my consultant at the time who kept saying to me - you're going to have to make a decision about what treatment you have. I disagreed and said that I was sure if we explored every avenue then an answer would become apparent - and it did.

What a time to find out that you have a rare Spanish blood type and that there were no bone marrow donors to match you in this country..... But at the same time I was accepted on a drugs trial for a totally new drug - the first time it had been available in this country. With hindsight - that going with the flow ended up being my lottery win.

Eleven years on I'm still here reaping the rewards!

So, perhaps to an almost annoying extent at times, I now go with the flow.......

And the flow of my life is currently leading me to seriously let go of the past, even the bits of it I never thought I'd be able to let go of.

But here I am tonight - for the first time ever, with a completely clean slate on the romantic front. Well now I hear you say - hasn't she been enjoying her single status for a few months now? Well, yes, but being me, there's always been someone there in the background ;-)

For the first time ever, there isn't, and strangely, that actually feels pretty good. Going with the flow has wiped all the slates clean and allowed me to finally let the past go.

So here I sit, aged 45, and for the first time in my life I am truly single - so my dear followers, I'm raising a glass of white as I write and saying cheers - here's to the future, whatever that may hold :-) xxx